Love and Relationships

How to become better when you are in Victim Stage

In 2021 I identified that I was in Victim stage, I thought ‘Life Happened to me’. I was running in the cycle of ‘Why are you doing this to me God?’ and blaming the situation happening to me.

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I saw the repeated patterns in my relationship where I was attracting the same kind of person. I was always saying to myself ‘I am not good enough and I don’t deserve a good things’. I never acknowledged how my subconcious was working. My only friends were anxiety and guilt that I carried around myself.

I came across this book ‘Attitude is Everything’ by Jeff Keller. ‘A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes’. This quote hit hard to me and I started working on my mindset. I was trying to change my habits and mindset. I avoided the procrastination loop and started my journey on being proactive. I was trying everything but I was still wondering where I was on the right path or not.

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I came across a coach who changed my life. I worked with her and she taught me so many things. I began journaling, gratitude, reading books that helped me increase my productivity. I noticed how people around me were toxic and I started creating boundaries. From carrying their shit to not giving zero fucks I made so many new friends who were positive. I met so many new people only when I did let go of the toxic people.

I moved in a new city which was my dream city to live in. I made new friends. I started writing my debut book and now I am happy that I made many brave decisions. From having a lack mindset to building an abundant mindset it took me a lot of time but it was all worthy. I tried so many things like affirmations, inner child healing, shadow work. I used many manifestation techniques where I got result effortlessly.

From ‘I am not good enough’ to ‘I am enough’, from ‘Why this happens to me?’ to ‘I am ready for challenges’ I grew a lot in two years. When I look back I see myself as underconfident, low self-esteem, directionless person. After working on my mindset and habits, now I am an action taker person, full of confidence and zeal.

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If you are someone who is going through a bad phase and have given upon yourself, trust me all you need to do is trust yourself.

Make lifestyle changes, build new habits, make new friends and connections. Get in touch with people who are one level higher than you. Seek help, don’t feel shy. My journey from self-sabotage to self-growth was overhwelming but it was worthy.

Our mind is hard-wired of seeking comfort but it is our job to rewire our mind to take actions. Make goals which are risk-worthy, you will learn a lot, you will learn to be consistent. You will be in a good company. You will meet people who will help you to accelarate in life.

P.S. Don’t be afraid of change. Believe in yourself. Start your healing journey.

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